DEAR READERS:
I promised in a TV interview to post on my website follow-ups regarding the unresolved third event in history that Scott Crockett, the protagonist of my sci-fi novel “Butterflies of the Cosmic Chaos,” would endeavor to change. Here is the first installment suggesting how we all can help change the course of history from the U.S. Capitol riot instigated by the President of the United States on January 6, 2021, to a better outcome. In the spirit of my novel, it is written as a fictional satire with a dead-serious conclusion about what we can do to make a difference – perhaps a dramatic “butterfly effect” times a million or more that can alter what happens next. Call it our midterm October Surprise.
– Steve Parks
NEWS FLASH!
This just in: The Turnip, America’s Funniest News Source and Last Surviving Live 24/7 Purveyor of the Truth as We Script It!
Jack Smith, the soon-to-be prosecuted prosecutor of Donald Trump’s incitement of the January 6 Capitol riot to overturn the result of the 2020 election, is filing a court order to have the popularly reviled President of the United States evicted from his residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW, Washington, D.C., also known as the White House. This comes on the heels of a nationwide groundswell of citizen-inscribed notices of eviction inspired by the author of the romantic poli-sci-fi fantasy “Butterflies of the Cosmic Chaos” by near-octogenarian and first-time-published novelist Steve Parks, who explores the consequences of traveling back in time to change the course of events on three dates in history: November 22, 1963; September 11, 2001, and January 6, 2021.
Here is Mr. Parks’ widely disseminated commentary about the demolition of “The People’s House,” not to mention crimes against humanity, democracy and every constitutional right imaginable.
Parks: “I’ve had it with Donald Trump. And I think with every passing day, millions more Americans agree with me.”
Sorry to interrupt, but continuing The Turnip’s rapidly evolving NEWS FLASH, this just in since we started to telecast the above commentary:
The Democratic National Committee has filed a $1.6 billion lawsuit against the “Trump-hired demolition contractors for destroying the wrong wing of the White House rather than wrecking the West Wing and the second-story Executive Residence in the center of the once-historic landmark.” In response, President Trump posted on his Lies Antisocial website: “So what? The whole damn place is a dump anyway. I can move in soon to the Melania Trump Ballroom and the DONALD THE GREAT Casino where my crypto coins are the only currency allowed – all just in time to stop the Communist Child Sex-Trafficking Democrat Party from rigging the Midterm Elections. After that we will be an ELECTION-FREE nation!”
AUTHOR’S NOTE: The above news satire about evicting Donald Trump from the White House did not come from the true root-vegetable publication known as The Onion, “America’s Finest News Source.” Please check out America’s funniest news source at theonion.com or subscribe to the monthly print edition at the same web address. As for evicting President Trump, whose free residency as a White House tenant expires at High Noon, January 20, 2029, any or all U.S. taxpaying citizens can serve him an eviction notice by mail.
EVICT DONALD TRUMP
We are the landlords of “The People’s House!” If you opposed the demolition of the East Wing and the construction of a massive ballroom that would make it almost impossible to ever restore the White House, exercise your right to serve the president with an eviction notice. This is a preliminary legal document requiring no attorney, but it is the right of every landlord to serve such a notice on a tenant who destroys the property he is occupying during a specifically limited period of time. The actual eviction comes later by court order.
To issue an evict-Trump notice, just click on this link and print out the suggested text. To send it to the White House, fill in the date on the blank line to the upper right and your signature at the lower left. Then mail it (USPS) to the White House – or rather what’s left of it. (The printed paper, envelope and postage are on you.) The White House address is 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW, Washington DC, 20500.
No return address is required for this notice to be mailed to the White House. To further distance your mail-in eviction “ballot,” just drop it off at any U.S. Post Office or mailbox on your next drive to anywhere out of town in the USA. We recommend a Red State mail-in.
Finally, dear readers: We recognize that there are many far more serious offenses against our economic and national security and simple human decency that President Trump 2.0 has committed. But they are far too numerous to list here. Your time is better spent expressing your outrage in this manner and to defeat Trump’s enablers by voting and supporting candidates who denounce his retributive and self-enriching policies in November’s mid-term elections. As citizens, we need to make him the lamest duck in U.S. history.
__________
Date
You are hereby notified, Donald J. Trump, that you are subject to eviction from your term-limited residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. NW, Washington D.C., 20500, unless you immediately cease and desist your demolition and construction on our property at that address.
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Landlord